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December 26, 2010 - We Love Satan Show

Joe and TimAs this LE began at midnight, December 26th, it began just as Christmas Day was ending. So we took credit for ending Christmas, yes, it was us, your welcome, everyone! So this was, of course, a We Love Satan Show. EVD, Little Gorgar, Adam, Tim, and Rick from The Metallic Onslaught, were there. They decided that Tim would be the most likely choice for Satan to inhabit, I mean he just screams out evil by his very being, of course he would be the one. So they got him prepared by having him do evil things. They had him twist Just Joe's nipple, steal Just Joe's Cheetos, and then give them to everyone but Just Joe. Tribute to the Past Russian Roulette was played. If a Christmas song, or a Satanic song played, then Just Joe would be thrown onto a barbed wire board. It did, so he did. Tim helped with that by sitting on his lap. They now thought Tim was sufficiently prepared, so they summoned Satan. But apparently Satan didn't want Tim, he wanted Rick, who would have ever thought that?! I mean, gentle, kind Rick?! Rick grabbed Adam, dragged him into the hallway, and, well, let's just say, there was only a mess of remains all over the hallway, and no Adam anywhere. So Adam was our sacrifice to Satan, everyone had thought that it would be Just Joe, including Just Joe himself. Rick didn't remember killing Adam when they told him Satan had made him do it to provide the sacrifice. Just Joe made a stew out of Adam's remains, and Tim ate it. He didn't know at first that that was what the stew was made out of, but, when he was told, he just said it was delicious, and kept right on eating. During a segment of Movie Time, Azkath became enraged when EVD told him he had seen the first episodes of the most recent "Doctor Who" series, and why hadn't any of them ever told him about that show and how good it was. Azkath beat the crap out of him, threw him out, and threw the barbed wire board on top of him. Azkath decided this would be a perfect day to summon an Elder God. He played some appropriate music, and waited to hear from the basement, which was where he summoned the God to appear, saying they could be contained down there. They listened via the microphone Azkath had set up. Soon there were strange sounds. Just Joe went to peek at what was down there. He said it was the evil bunnies he had seen when they sent him into the future a while back. And they were rapidly multiplying, as rabbits always do. Just Joe went and got a gun and started shooting the bunnies. When that didn't work well enough, he set off a grenade. That worked, it destroyed all the bunnies, leaving yet another stew like mess of remains all over the basement. Someone will probably be fed that, maybe Tim. Azkath said that, maybe he had brought about the bunnies in the future, and, since they were now destroyed, maybe Just Joe should go back to the future (wait, that sounds familiar, wasn't there some movies with that title or something?), and check on what was happening there now. Just Joe didn't want to, but Azkath hypnotized him, sent him two years and one month into the future, and asked him what he saw now. No bunnies. But a lot of shoggoths, eating all the people. Then Just Joe started screaming, really loudly. But, when asked what he was seeing now, all he would shriek was that it was unspeakable. He was hysterical, and extremely loud, so Azkath brought him back. Just Joe didn't remember being in the future, or what he had seen. He thought he had saved the day by destroying the bunnies, not realizing, or remembering, that, now that the shoggoths weren't able to eat the bunnies, they were eating the people. So now that's the future we apparently look forward to. Happy Holidays, everyone. As I made mention of, there was Movie Time, a few segments of it throughout the night, with Tim and EVD participating in some of them, that is until Azkath kicked EVD out violently, as I mentioned above. There was a lot of music about and praising Satan all night, and, for one last time, some Christmas music, of the Last Exit variety... 
-Fire Eater Wizard
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