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Classic Last Exit

December 29, 1996 - Skyclad Feature

Demon Slams SlothSloth and Azkath host the show and play clips from Earlier in the year. Also we have Skyclad as our band feature...

 This Show is from about 2 and a half years after we started The Last Exit for the Lost. It's quite a bit different from the current version of the show. Nice look back, though. Sloth and I did the hosting of most of this, if I remember right, and the whole show is not intact, as we had to use cassette tapes at the show to tape and actually remember to turn them over and switch them. We also did Skyclad as a feature artist on this show...

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November 30, 1997 - Z'Ha'Dum Show

 The Demon Azkath

This was one of our Z'Ha'Dum shows. The name comes from the TV show, Babylon 5, one of Azkath's favorites. It was the home planet of a race called The Shadows. Fittingly, these shows were dark themed, Goth, Black Metal, Desolate sounding music overall. This was one of many different themed shows early on in the show's history.

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April 23, 2000 - We Love Satan Show

Azkath

One of our early We Love Satan Shows. There are some breaks where tapes ran out, but most of it is here. The idea came about when one of the other station personal, made some comment about everyone who listens to Metal being into Satan. Azkath responded, that's right, We All LOVE Satan. Then the idea for the show was born. Focus on the Satanic music, and do it with a sense of humor and very tongue in cheek. Mostly...

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May 14, 2000 - Tribute to the Past Show / Last Show from Linden Ave.

IMAG0605

When we showed up to do our show on May 13th, we found out that our building was condemned, as you can see from the above pic. This wasn't that big of a shock really, as the building hasn't been in the best of shape for many years. Also, not surprising was a note below it for WVBR personal to continue as usual. So, while doing the show on that night we had to pack up our entire CD collection, Record Collection, and miscellaneous other things. This was not a small task and took most of the night, hence the reason that the show came off a little more disjointed than normal that night. It was pretty chaotic, but we had to have everything out by Sunday night. It was about a month before we moved into the new building on Mitchell St. I tried to fix up this recording as best I could. Filled in most of the gaps and cleaned the sound up. Enjoy this piece of history. We did it as a Tribuet to the Past Show, another of our regular themes, as we used those shows to focus on older music. 

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February 3, 2002 - The Infamous Hat Humping Incident and We Love Satan Show

Zoltan After Hat Humping

From Azkath: Ok, that was one hell of a strange show. Anytime we do a We Love Satan show on The Last Exit, it usually is, but I had no way to predict what would have happened. I think the most um, outstanding, strange thing was Vern's sudden affection for Zoltan's furry hat. After that was said and done, and Vern had "screwed himself to death", Zoltan was peacefully reading a story when Friend came shrieking into the studio and carried him around it. It wasn't a good night for Zoltan. And he kept trying to claim that his appearance last week was by an imposter... Anyway, earlier, I received an e-mail from Zoltan...

--- Sunday, February 3, 2002 (aka The Day After) --- --- MEMO FROM THE DESK OF ZOLTAN THE AVENGER --- ------ (technically Z-monster's strawberry iMac): ------

Just when I thought I was finally starting to break my unnatural & unhealthy late-night Last Exit habit...

...a Zoltan-The-Avenger imposter (yes, imposter, dammit!!!) comes along and ruins everything!

As a result of the previous weekend's despicable mockage of my undeniable greatness, I was forced to -- yet again -- defend my superhero honor last night (in the name of all that is denim, i.e., cool). I foolishly assumed that this would be another one of those regular, routine Avengement visits. Weh-heh-hell, I got a lot more than I bargained for... A HAT-LOAD MORE!!!

I can't decide what disturbs me more -- the atrocities themselves, or my deep and sickening suspicion that there exists ample videocamera footage of the brutal mayhem (there always seems to be a camera conveniently available when it's ME who's being attacked! (...a camera, by the way, which was being operated by a rather inappropriately gleeful Foul Mouth Girl)).

So, not only am I now virtually guaranteed to be forced to relive (no doubt repeatedly) the suffering and humiliation of last night, but the entire world will now be afforded puh-lenty of opportunity to share in my torment (...and by "sharing" I mean, of course, laughing their asses off at my expense...).

I'm at a loss to come up with an explanation for why Vern, the Horrifically Horny Mopkin, decided that he was simply so in lust with my formerly-almighty Fuzzy Hat of Avengement that he absolutely HAD to have sex with it...... really, really scary sex...

One might be tempted to chalk it up to some sort of species-specific Mopkinal hormone burst, perhaps triggered by a very unfortunately-timed bout with puppet puberty...

But, then how would one explain his previous impregnation of the Evil Quaker's wife??

No, the Lust Fairy had obviously paid a visit to this depraved lint-bag long before his recent sexcapade upon my head.

Is there some sort of medication that Vern has been on (or should be on?!!) that he may have forgotten to take before coming to the station (and on my hat)???

We could (but won't) explore the deeper issues of shaky Mopkin self-discipline, puppet-monkey hybrid-induced genetic insanity, or the possible existence of some primal, irresistable urge to mate with fuzzy objects (particularly those resembling a gigantic (and admittedly somewhat seductive) monkey vulva).

Such contemplation, however, while potentially interesting in an academic sort of way, would merely serve to distract from the main issue here, which is...

AAAAHHH!!! VERN HUMPED MY HEAD!!! YUCKY!!!

(I have certainly gained some deep appreciation for what Z-monster must've went through when he was so heinously licked by the All-blighty Monkey last year -- I sure wouldn't want to trade experiences with him... or would I... mmmm... no, definitely not...).

Let the record show (as if that would do any good) that while sleazy-sicko Vern was using the top of my head as his own, personal, sexual rodeo, I, Zoltan The Avenger, was bravely (nay, heroically) trying -- against steep & sticky odds -- to do my solemn duty to read a very important story about... ummmmmm... I don't remember (maybe because I was a bit distracted at the time by the moaning & gyrating filth-puppet ecstatically singing "Boner-nanza" directly above me).

...Oh, and as if all that abuse wasn't more than enough for one night, when I eventually managed to wearily effect a grossly-overdue Vern-dismount from my hapless, linty-goo-covered superhero hat (with a Mopkin-bite on my knuckles to show for my efforts), I was "treated" to one of the most appallingly violent Friendings ever to disgrace the hellowed halls of The Last Exit for the Humiliated (also unfortunately-but-not-surprisingly caught on the maddeningly omni-present Camera of Woe, thank you very much, you Foul-mouthed Sado-voyeuristic Beeotch!!!).

Man, was I tired when I got home...

(My only consolation was that Vern did manage to "screw himself" to death! HA! That was cool...)

-- Z.T.A.

TRAGIC P.S. -- Sadly, as a result of all the horrific humping endured by the apparently all-too-lovable Fuzzy Hat of Avengement, my faithful head-top companion has been forced into a regrettably early retirement. After stopping at the nearest garment-hospital's emergency room to have the vile Mopkin-juice scraped from its battered and tender folds, my beloved Fuzzy-Fedora will now proceed to undergo a series of post-trauma counseling sessions, starting next week. I won't compound this unpleasantness any further by adding that my poor, rodeo-raped buddy, who is emotionally (and, quite frankly, physically) scarred for life, has now been confirmed to be...... pregnant. (And I give you that freak-of-nature Vern-offspring "Enoch" as reason enough for not wanting to discuss this any further right now...)

RIGHTEOUSLY VENOMOUS P.P.S. -- To Vern: While I've hoped all along that your eventual and irrevocable demise would someday "come" under far-more-unpleasant-for-you circumstances, I nonetheless fervently pray that this latest installment (in what has been a ridiculously long string of disappointing Vern-"deaths") is -- at long last -- the real deal! For the sake of all that is decent and denim, STAY DEAD!!!
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Ahem. Yeah... So there's Zoltan's perspective. And the video is great. You can see it below, this show's clips starts around the 6 minute mark... I should note that it was the Fear of Pop "In Love" song which featured William Shatner that caused Vern to 'Fall In Love' with Zoltan's hat.

Oh, and yet another testiment to our 'evilness', not only have we blown up Z-Monster's I-Mac, been mentioned in a book by The Anti-Christ, and other such things that I once listed, but I was now informed that entering our chat room caused someone's computer's power supply to die. Of course, I know you're saying, impossible, couldn't of had anything to do with it, but dammit, we're taking credit!

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May 12, 2002 - Shoebox's Debut / Armageddon Show

The Recap by Azkath...

Zoltan Shoebox Timmy 2Ok, so the rain here started during the show and pretty much has not let up since. Maybe Zoltan was right when he was building the ark. Everything is starting to flood...

Our little musical ritual is complete. If all goes as it should, SOMETHING should happen Wednesday. Maybe it will just keep raining... No sign of Nibiru, but there is that planetary alignment, which completes, I believe, tonight...

Well, what can I say? It was chaos. Moreso than I can ever remember in recent history. First, before the show, I sicked Jeffie on Ithaska. He thinks they liked him. Then I tossed him out of the station and we proceeded with The Last Exit. I dusted off the Wheel of Satan, for maybe the last time, and pushed the button / aka spun the wheel. Vern was there. He was still insane. The wheel fixed that. So, since I had a more sane and unfornately also more annoying Vern (he was actually sort of funny and not irritating when insane - weird...) I had him give away boxes of free stuff. That went well, but it could have gone better. If by some chance, the world is still here next week, we will give away what we have left. Ok, so then the wheel was spun again, and up came Zoltan the Avenger, staight from Hell, with his Denim jacket AND Hawiian shirt, and Fuzzy Hat, and FuzzNubby (Vern's offspring). Then we had a nifty visit from Shoebox of The Worm Quartet. He brought us a Giant Tampon. Kind of him. Hmmm... Then there was some chaos, Friend showed up and, well, Friended everyone. In a really strange moment, which is definitely a sign of the end of the world, Friend put on Zoltan's fuzzy hat, and BECAME Zoltan the Avenger. It was bizarre. And unerving for Zoltan. Eventually, Timmy the Prophet of Doom wandered in and it was all complete. Mayhem was fully underway. Eventually Zoltan decided he wanted to leave. Friend bolted with FuzzNubby. I spun the Wheel of Satan for perhaps the last time, and it disallowed Zoltan back into Hell. Despite not liking Hell, we was upset. Probably just because he wasn't allowed to be there anymore. Satan claimed his excessive grievences were too much for even him. ZTA is now stuck wandering the earth. At the end, there was a great little sing-a-long and the end of the Qabalistic Ritual, bringing us to Kether. And that was it.

As for Shoebox, he brought us some cool stuff, aka two of his older CD's. Check out his webpage at www.wormquartet.com. 

Happy Armageddon!!

** Below is the audio of the full show, and the Best of DVD that contains the video from this night, which starts around the 45 minute mark... **

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